Living as a Swarm of Flies
How murky water, rotting meat, and unfiltered beliefs destroy intimacy
For over two minutes, John pulled against the current, moved backward, underneath the water, something had his leg, he could not escape. We were powerless against the force of the river’s invisible beast, we could not see, we could not help. Nothing worked. The water was too dark, dirty, and we had no clarity.
John nearly drowned.
Gladly, whatever arrested his leg let him go. He swam to shore breathless, knowing he nearly perished. That day, I swore to never swim in murky water again.
The same for drinking.
We don’t seek to enjoy or ingest dirty water. It needs filtering, for clarity, purity, and safety. Drinking murky water is akin to swimming in it. You never know what you're in for. Yet when it comes to our beliefs and ideas, we seem to permit murkiness and cloudiness to remain with no regard for the dangers lurking within.
When we swim in the waters of thought without filters, we are often grabbed and pulled into deep caverns of ideas. If we are not careful, we can become enslaved at great cost.
Our beliefs and thoughts can become so tangled that we are unable to reach the shore to evaluate the noise. We find ourselves refusing alternative ideas, plugging our mental ears like a child at a Van Halen concert. With our mental ears covered, we become myopic (seeing only one way) and involuntarily ignorant creating the potential for destruction, especially in relationships and our minds.
We all know that a word can have various meanings. Even when a definition is supplied, it is only as true as the context of its use. Dictionaries don’t define words, they are a curation of definitions based on consensus of use.
Thoughts without filters affect the mind and relationships. For instance, in 2020 a group of like-minded people relocated across the country in an attempt to be near each other. The reason? They had a shared religious belief in the doctrines of grace and love according to the Bible. Ironically, when someone defined the English words a bit differently, a wave of odd and psychotic attacks ensued turning many people against each other out of fear.
Because these individuals were not able to emotionally and cognitively filter their thinking, they had no patience to hear an explanation of terms by others. This resulted in deathly arrogance and isolation as several relationships were destroyed. Dozens of families were uprooted, friends lost, and emotional, financial, and physical harm was catastrophic. This is where filtering ideas would have saved a lot of pain.
We absorb information constantly and have the tendency to become unconsciously averse to contrary ideas. It is crucial to acknowledge the dangers of unchecked absorption. Our minds should act as filters, allowing in only that which is beneficial, insightful, and grounded in truth. By engaging in critical thinking, we can discern the value of the information we encounter and prevent ourselves from being overwhelmed by the murky waters of myopic unintentional ignorance.
Critical thinking helps us avoid another pitfall, the Echo Chamber.
This happens when we seek to find like-minded people who are verbatim to our own voices and who only reinforce our existing beliefs. Instead of challenging ourselves to grow and expand our perspectives, we find comfort in the familiarity of our own thoughts. This approach hinders intellectual growth and stifles our ability to engage with diverse ideas, and by implication, diverse people. We have to step outside of our echo chambers, actively seek out alternative viewpoints, and engage in thoughtful dialogue that allows for growth and understanding.
By immersing ourselves solely in our own beliefs and shutting out alternative perspectives, we become isolated from the broader spectrum of human experience. Our interactions become limited, and we lose the richness of diversity in ideas, values, and perspectives. This isolation not only hampers our ability to empathize with others but also diminishes our own humanity. In order to maintain genuine connections and foster meaningful relationships, we must be open to hearing and considering different viewpoints, even if they challenge our own. Even when alternative views are erroneous, it never hurts to understand how others think.
There’s an old saying, “You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar.” While this has nothing to do with the topic of this writing, I do think about echo chambers like a swarm of flies. And that doesn’t give me a good feeling.
I don’t want flies. I surely don’t want to be one.
When we isolate our thinking and have divided our lives from others, our small circles may feel like a safe place but we’re more like a swarm of flies than a community. Like flies, we can all be drawn to the same rotting pile of meat, thinking we’re eating well and healthy. We should rather be intentional about tasting and eating from the buffet of discerning intimacy rather than the ‘safe’ meal of rot. Because at the swarm, one small divergence will result in our safe haven becoming a place of destruction, then we become the meat. Drawing scavengers begins to consume us, our minds, our lives, and our very souls.
Then we are alone.
Isolated.
Recognizing the dangers of unfiltered absorption, echo chambers, and isolation, we can take proactive steps to filter the information we encounter and cultivate a more balanced and informed mindset. The following resolutions can guide us in navigating the complex waters of thought:
Acknowledge the Potential Bias
Recognize that our beliefs and ideas are not infallible, and remain open to the possibility of alternative perspectives. Embracing humility allows us to approach discussions with curiosity and a willingness to learn, enabling personal growth and the expansion of our understanding.
Embrace Respectful Engagement
Respectfully engage with differentiated ideas, listening actively and genuinely seeking to understand diverse viewpoints. By creating a space for thoughtful dialogue, we can transcend the limitations of our own echo chambers and broaden our perspectives.
Harness the Power of Filtering
Filtering our thoughts and ideas is essential for fostering intimacy and maintaining genuine connections. Just as we filter water for clarity, we must filter the information we consume to ensure that what we absorb aligns with our values and contributes positively to our relationships. Being in conversation with others helps us listen, care, and be attentive to our own biases.
Identify Areas of Concern
Recognize the specific domains in our lives where unfiltered absorption poses a significant challenge. Whether it is religion, politics, social issues, or economics, being aware of the potential biases and pitfalls in these areas empowers us to approach them with greater discernment and critical thinking. Just like the “word fear” I mentioned earlier, we are usually unaware when we’re being unfiltered. The test is how we feel around others in a moment of disagreement.
Seek Growth-Oriented Relationships
Surround ourselves with individuals who not only share our values but also challenge us to evaluate our ideas critically. By engaging with diverse perspectives, we can transcend the limitations of our own thinking, foster personal growth, and develop a more nuanced understanding of the world and those who live in it with us. As a person who thrives in community, I don’t want the wrong people around me. This isn’t looking for the heads nodding yes, it means I’m looking for real friends and caring people who can disagree but still be true friends.
Love as the Guiding Principle
Embrace love and empathy as guiding principles in our interactions with others. When we approach differing opinions with understanding and compassion, we create an environment where genuine connections can flourish, even amidst disagreements. Love becomes the bridge that transcends division and fosters unity.
In a world where information flows abundantly and effortlessly, it is our responsibility to be discerning and deliberate in what we absorb. Just as we would filter water to ensure its purity, we must filter our thoughts and ideas to maintain clarity and integrity. Engaging with diverse perspectives, challenging our own beliefs, and fostering intimate connections with empathy, we can rise above the murky waters of unfiltered absorption and embrace a more enlightened and empathetic existence. Let us be comfortable with discomfort, for it is through this discomfort that we can truly grow and live intimately with others.