Summer 2002.
I arrived at youth summer camp and was handed the registration packet. Peeking through the pages I noticed the form: BREAKOUT WORKSHOP INFO SHEET
It was blank.
“Odd… I guess we won’t be doing anything with that” as I placed it back into the envelope.
Later in the orientation I was asked, “Where is your breakout info sheet? We needed that last week in order to get everything lined up for the scheduling.”
What I didn’t realize, because I had just arrived in Virginia a few weeks prior, is that every adult leader, specifically the pastors on campus, was required to teach a breakout workshop. This info sheet would prepare the registration options for the students to “pick” which breakout they would attend throughout the week.
The rooms/venues would be selected based on the registration numbers.
“I don’t have a breakout.”
“Well, James, you have to have one, just pick a topic and turn it in. You can get your outline, activities, games, interactions, etc. in tomorrow.”
“OK, then the title of my breakout is “Don’t Pick This!”
After some back and forth, the guy realized I was serious. When asked what it was about, I replied, “It’s about nothing interesting and no one in their right mind would come.” (or something like that)
Well, that was printed.
My breakout was the largest registered event for the week.
I had no idea what I was going to do.
So, I decided to do what I do best: illusions and comedy.
I jotted down ten of my favorite horrible stories and experiences and found a way to tie them all together to the theme of JOY and happiness.
Then, chose to close the sessions with an exegetical overview of the biblical teaching of Joy.
The class was amazing. We had a great time, learned a lot, and enjoyed the laughter. By the end of the week, the buzz around my stories carried a sense of joy that I had hoped to cultivate. The most amazing part of this was that I had no plan, no outline, and no idea what I was doing. I was just being authentic.
[I do not recommend this model of preparation for events]
But today, in July of 2023, I learned something about myself that I never understood.
If I am authentic, I DO have something valuable to say, I DO have something that can help others… I AM in some sense, valuable to the world. And my experiences, stories, and abilities are a gift to others. Not everyone will enjoy or like what I am, but some will and those are my people.
What I wanted to do that summer was crawl into a hole and vanish. I wanted someone to say to me, “James, it’s OK, you don’t have to do a breakout.” But that wasn’t an option, and I was just James.
For years, I molded the idea of conference speaking around my life’s stories. I learned to take horrible memories (comedic in itself) and make them funny. I learned that even the darkest moments of my life would connect with others in ways that I couldn’t dream of.
For the first time ever, as I write this essay, I realize that part of my personal monopoly is sharing my life and sharing its impact with others in the voice that I’ve been given.
This past Sunday a very close family member, who is often reserved in speaking about their opinion said to me, “James, I’m not being ugly when I say this, but today when you taught, your fire was back. You sounded like yourself.” Another person standing with them said holding back tears, “I could hear your joy had returned.”
Life unfolds as it wishes. By the hand of a greater good. I know this. I also know a love like this. (Ask me)
So, life isn’t always about planning and purpose.
It’s not always about developing new tools and skills.
There isn’t always going to be an ROI.
But there is always going to be you. Plain and simple, you.
So, for me. I want to be AUTHENTIC. That means being who I am, the good and the not-so-good. And embracing the truth of me in a way that I can admit my faults and weaknesses and shine in my strengths.
I challenge you to do the same.
If you’re having a hard time seeing it, I can help.
They don’t call me the Slayer of Sadness and the Stormer of Brains for nothing… there IS something to this…
I talk to people. I Listen, learn, and LIVE - as I also help others do the same.
This may sound way to ambiguous and simple, but for me, life should be this way. Let’s pave the way together.
If I were to list all the people in my life who have guided me to this place, the servers would crash around the world. For some of you, you know who you are… for others, I cannot wait to share how you’ve inspired me!
When is this coming out as a book? With this title, and this story as your intro, you've got a winner.
At the beginning, I was giving you snaps, in the middle, I was clapping, and at the end I wanted to give you a hug. James, this was an incredible use of your voice - I love the storytelling about the camp breakout. I think another funny message here is that people like to do what they are told not to do haha.
Happy for you and proud of you. Onwards!